As a family photographer, you would think I’d have my own family photoshoots completely under control.
The truth?
When it’s time for my own family photos, I become exactly like many of my clients.
I start wondering what everyone should wear, whether the children’s hair will behave, whether someone will spill something on their clothes five minutes before we leave, and whether we’ll actually get those beautiful family photographs I’ve imagined.
Then I have to remind myself of something I tell every family who steps in front of my camera.
The best family photos are rarely the ones where everything goes perfectly.
They’re the ones where everyone feels relaxed, connected, and free to enjoy the moment.
After photographing hundreds of families across the Netherlands, I’ve learned that preparing your children for a family photoshoot isn’t about creating the perfect evening. It’s about creating an environment where they can simply be themselves.
One family, in particular, taught me that lesson.
A Mum's Routine That Changed the Way I Think About Family Photoshoots
One of my long-time clients, Anja, books two to three family photoshoots with me every year.
I’ve photographed her family since I first moved to the Netherlands, and over the years I’ve watched her children grow through my lens. Because she’s experienced so many sessions, I genuinely see her as an expert when it comes to preparing children for a family photoshoot.
After a little trial and error, she created a simple routine that works brilliantly for her family.
Start talking about the photoshoot early
Because our sessions usually take place in the evening, Anja mentions it during the morning.
But instead of saying, “We’re having family photos taken tonight,” she tells her children: “Tonight we’re going to run around, play together and have fun while the photographer takes some pictures.”
It’s such a small change, but it completely changes the atmosphere.
The photoshoot isn’t something they have to perform for. It’s simply a fun evening together as a family.
Keep the rest of the day normal
Rather than planning the entire day around the session, Anja sticks to her family’s normal routine.
They have dinner at their usual time, and if needed, the children have a quick shower afterwards.
Everyone stays in comfortable clothes until just before they leave the house. Only then do they change into their photoshoot outfits, keeping them clean and making the journey much more comfortable.
After the session, it’s straight home and off to bed.
Keeping everything familiar helps the children feel calm instead of overwhelmed.
Make the journey enjoyable
On the drive to the location, the children get to watch a story on the tablet.
Rather than rushing everyone into the car, the journey becomes part of the fun and helps everyone arrive in a good mood.
Bring a special post-photoshoot treat
One of my favourite parts of Anja’s routine is her snack box.
She packs a lunchbox with treats her children don’t usually get.
After running, exploring, playing games and cuddling throughout the session, they’re always hungry, so the snack box becomes something they genuinely look forward to.
It’s a simple reward that helps keep everyone motivated and gives them a little energy boost afterwards.
Why This Routine Works
I love Anja’s approach because it focuses on how the evening feels instead of how the photographs should look.
Children don’t enjoy being told to smile for an hour. They enjoy playing. They enjoy exploring. They enjoy laughing with their parents.
When the focus shifts from “We have to get perfect photos” to “We’re going to have a lovely evening together,” children relax naturally.
And relaxed children create the most genuine photographs.
More Tips for a Relaxed Family Photoshoot
Leave Plenty of Time
One of the biggest causes of stress before a family photoshoot is simply running late.
Children pick up on our emotions incredibly quickly. If you’re feeling rushed, they’ll often feel rushed too. Leave a little earlier than you think you need to. Give yourself time to park, walk to the location and settle in before we begin.
Starting the session calmly makes a huge difference.
Don’t Worry About Perfect Behaviour
This is probably the biggest piece of advice I can give... Your children don’t need to sit still. They don’t need to smile perfectly. They don’t need to look at the camera in every photograph.
Some of my favourite images happen when children are simply being themselves.
A grass stain. Wind-blown hair. Big belly laughs. Curious little faces. Spontaneous cuddles. Those aren’t imperfections, they’re memories!
As your family photographer, I’m not looking for perfect children. I’m looking for connection.
Trust Your Photographer
Many parents worry that their children won’t cooperate. The truth is, they don’t have to.
My job isn’t to make children stand perfectly still. My job is to guide your family, make everyone feel comfortable, and photograph the connection that’s already there.
Some of the best moments happen while you’re walking together, playing games, giving piggyback rides, sharing cuddles, or simply talking to one another.
Those are the photographs that become more valuable with every passing year.
A Final Reminder From One Mum to Another
Every year, when it’s my own family’s turn in front of the camera, I have to remind myself of exactly the same thing.
My children won’t remember whether their outfits matched perfectly... They won’t remember whether someone got muddy knees... They won’t remember whether every strand of hair stayed in place.
They’ll remember running... Laughing... Playing... And being together. And when I look back at our family photographs years from now, I know those are the moments I’ll treasure too.
If you’re planning a family photoshoot in the Netherlands and you’re looking for a relaxed, natural experience where your children can simply be themselves, I’d love to help.
My family photography sessions are all about genuine connection, playful moments, and creating timeless photographs that tell the story of your family exactly as you are.